Here’s five fun limericks based on some of this weeks most intriguing search terms. Warning: may contain R-rated material and potty jokes and/or references to Men from Nantucket.
The links are where these folks likely ended up.
1.
“Peanut butter and jelly fine dining”
You searched this as your wife was pining
For a meal with her beau
But you had little dough
And your chances of sex were declining
2.
You didn’t know quite what to do
You had clogged up your girlfriends loo
So while staring at turds
You typed in the words
“flushing an unflushable poo”
3.
You had run over someone’s cat
The sound it made, something like SPLAT!
Now your tire looked low
But you didn’t quite know
So you searched the words “is my tire flat”
4.
You pulled out your favorite tubes
From your basket of sexual lubes
But something was creeping
A rodent was peeping
So you searched “squirrel looking at boobs”
5.
You were selected to be on a panel
For a show on the Hillbilly channel
But your knowledge was short
Of your part to report
So you searched “stoned goat wearing flannel”
Perhaps I’ll have to turn this into a weekly feature! Your challenge? Write me a limerick from one of your recent funny search terms. It’s harder than you might think!
The Brown Road Chronicles 
Awesome search terms and awesome limericks. I can’t stop laughing at the poo one.
Is amazing the number of times I get similar searches since writing that original post. Clearly it’s a serious problem!
I will TOTALLY do this if you will make it a regular feature. PLEASE!!!!!
Okay, it’s under consideration.
You would think that my page was x-rated
from the searches that die there ill-fated
“couldn’t fit inside me”
no doubt wanted to ride me
But left my blog site self-deflated.
Lol… Nice work!
As were all of yours, Steve! 🙂
I don’t think I can top “stoned goat wearing flannel”!
It’s bizarre, yet so very specific?!?!
It’s either hysterical or frightening, I’m not sure which.
OK…no joke…this showed up yesterday as a “search term” No need to write a poem. It seems to already be one. Please explain..I’m certain you understand the quirks of the internet better than I…
“i am sorry that i made you cry, it hurts me so bad that i want to die. in you i have found a love that is true, and my heart is filled with love for you. i am sorry that i have hurt you and you are in pain, but without you, my life will not be the same. as i sit here writing this to you, i am crying, thinking how much i was a fool. i love you so much and i am sorry that we got into a fight, i just wish that i could have made it up to you on that night, i don?t want to break up and i wish we didn?t have this fight, i just wish that this were so, i never have loved anyone else as much as i loved you, i thought that you should know. i am sorry whatever should i do? i want to take the time and apologize to you. you fill my heart with joy, and you make my life complete, everytime you come around me my heart skips a beat. i leave my phone on and i lye by it every night, just in case you call me if you feel something is not right. every night i think of you as i lye in the dark, and i close my eyes and i see you holding on to me with your head against my heart. before i go and put this poem to an end, i want to say i am sorry and it will never happen again. jamie i am sorry we fought and i love you so much please forgive me”
huh??
Wow, they must have been looking for a very specific web page!?!?! I’ve occasionally gotten search terms that seemed kind of like someone was typing a line of lyrics in, but never like this. So, I typed that all into Google and yours was the first site that popped up… weird! Ha, I’m only kidding!
Whilst flushing my poo ridden bog,
I chanced upon your funny blog,
No advice could I find,
But you took my mind,
Of a turd that was jammed like a log.